“We must be willing to get rid of the life we’ve planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” ~ Joseph Campbell

As I was starting this blog, a friend requested that I keep true to the “facts of life” – I think he meant more along the lines of the standards of living in some of the places that the Peace Corps goes – but not all “facts of life” are physical, as I have learned since my graduation in December.

Serving in the Peace Corps had been a dream of mine since I was in middle school – I fantasized about a life filled with adventure, using another language (or two, or three…) and using my skills and expertise to do whatever I could to make the world a better place. My plan was to achieve that dream right after graduation.  However, life or God or the cosmos, or whoever you want to believe, had other plans - plans I didn’t realize what were being set into motion at the time.

One random day, my friend, Ian, from Engineers Without Borders (EWB), told me about a guest speaker that was coming to campus from the Chicago chapter of EWB, saying that this speaker would be VERY informative and useful for my serving with Peace Corps. I was interested in going, but, as the day came closer, school work was piling up, and with the end of the semester looming over us, I was more concerned about graduating than about a speaker. The day of the meeting I was working in our senior design lab when Ian reminded me about the meeting. I tried convincing him that I was too busy to go; I was interested but needed to get my stuff done “so I could graduate”. He thought this was a BS response, so proceeded to try to persuade me to go to the meeting. We eventually got to the point where we were literally arguing about whether or not I should go to this meeting. (Something along the lines of: Ian-“But this is what you want to do with your life!”; Me-“ But I can’t do it if I don’t graduate!”)

My own stubbornness was almost my demise. Luckily for me, Ian was equally as stubborn, and I was all out of excuses.Right before leaving he turned to say

 “Jessi, I really think you should go to this. This guy has been everywhere and seen everything. He could really help you with anything you need for the Peace Corps. We are going to have a business meeting first then he is going to speak, you should really come up.” And with that he left.

I wrestled with myself for a good ten minutes or so, watching the clock tick closer to the meeting time. I pondered sitting in the meeting, listening to what I was assuming to be a middle-aged man expound upon his life-experience of projects in other countries. It could be hit or miss – sometimes these presentations are really interesting, sometimes they are as dry as the homework I was working on. Did I really need more of that in my day? I eventually concluded that, if anything, it would be a good excuse to take a break from my homework. Besides, who knew? Maybe Ian would be right and maybe it would be worthwhile for me – there was only one way to find out...

There are so many decisions that I have made in life that make me wonder where I would be, or what my life would be like if I had chosen something else. The decision to actually listen to Ian and go to the damn meeting is one of those decisions. I have moments now where I look back and fear that this is all just a dream and I DIDN’T go to the meeting and I am still waiting for my life to become what I wanted it to be. The lesson I was about to learn wasn’t that Ian is always right (sorry Ian!), but that  you never know when an opportunity will come along to blow your sails in the direction of the life waiting for you.

I went into the room and sat in the corner by the door, away from everyone, ready to dodge out in case I felt the need to continue working on my school work (when I look back on this I roll my eyes at myself). The speaker, Frank, was very experienced with working in different communities world-wide, and was much younger than I expected. His presentation was not only refreshing, but also very inspiring – if this guy, who isn’t that much older than us, can do so much, what can we do? What can I do? I just listened to him and absorbed everything I could; the information he was sharing was definitely useful for what I wanted to do. I also realized that what he was doing was very much in line with what I wanted to do with my life - maybe Peace Corps wasn't the only answer? My stubborn side hated to admit it, but Ian was definitely right about me attending this.

Toward the end of the meeting, as the group was asking questions, and as I was realizing that I had been on the losing side of an argument with Ian, Ian decided to inform everyone - “By the way, that is Jessica in the corner. She is here because she is planning to go into the Peace Corps and wanted to learn about volunteering and working in communities in other countries.” This is, again, another moment that makes me wonder what would be different in my life if this HADN’T happened. I hated all the sudden, unexpected attention at the time, but this also had a major effect on my life plans and to Ian I am extremely grateful.

This announcement generated a lot of buzz among my peers and after the meeting one of the members came up to talk to me:

Ethan – So when are you going?
Me – I don’t know but it won’t be for at least a year.

Ethan – Really? What are you going to do between graduation and then?
Me – I don’t know, look for something short-term? I applied for AmeriCorps, and we will see what else comes up; maybe an internship or something short-term

Ethan – Well, I know the organization that I had internships with in Chicago is hiring a data analyst for 3-4 months, would you be interested?
Me – That could be a definite possibility. Can you give me their information?

After graduation I got in touch with the organization and set up an interview. During the interview they informed me that they were also hiring an energy auditor, which would be a full-time, permanent position and they would ask me some questions for that opening. Within a few weeks of the interview I received an offer for the energy auditor position - this is where dealing with the internal “facts of life” comes in. If I were to accept the position, it would mean putting off the Peace Corps and moving to Chicago – something I had NOT been mentally preparing for. I had to decide between taking a job that felt so right in so many ways (sometimes you just know), or waiting for one of my biggest dreams to come true. There were sleepless nights. There were tears. There were arguments with my parents. There was the harsh reality of $40,000 of student debt that I would have to start paying off in a few months. If I joined the Peace Corps, that debt could be deferred, but when would I actually join? How long would I want that to follow me around for? How would I even make payments before serving? The debt felt so restraining. Plus, in reality, this job just seemed WAY too fitting for me to pass up and Peace Corps wasn’t going the way I had hoped (that will be another post, I promise). Sometimes you just get a gut feeling about something in life, and this was one of those times. I opted for the energy auditor position and on March 1^st, I moved from Milwaukee to the windy city.

I love my job. They say that if you love what you do, you never work a day in your life, and that is EXACTLY how I feel. Yes, that might change as time goes on, but I get so much joy out of what I do. We go to people’s homes, apartment buildings, et cetra and give them suggestions on improving their energy usage. If it is applicable, we also help them with rebates and low interest loans to help pay for some of the suggestions. Some of our clients are low to moderate income, and they are SOOO happy for us to come and help them. The needs of some of these people are very real, and their pure joy at hearing how we can help them is unbelievable. I had a bit of an epiphany the other day as I was standing on the roof of a building in Uptown: the life I am living right now, here in the city, is EXACTLY what I wanted, I just didn’t realize it. I wanted to help people, I wanted to go on adventures (its Chicago – everyday is an adventure!), I wanted to use my skills for something good and I am even learning Spanish and Polish/Slovak. The only thing that isn’t true right now is that I am not living in another country – but, who knows? That might be yet to come…

Until then, I have decided to join the Chicagoland Professional Chapter of EWB and am extremely excited to see how and what I can contribute to their projects –maybe I will get my travel fix there or achieve some of the other dreams that I had for Peace Corps. And yes, this is also the same chapter that Frank, the speaker that visited my campus back in December, is a part of - it’s kind of funny how life twirls you around and drops you off so close to what started everything. 

As for my future, I don't know what it holds, but if it’s anything like the past few months, it should be a whirl wind of exciting adventures as I venture into the life that has been awaiting me. I am so excited to see where it leads!

And if it wasn’t clear enough already, special thanks to: Ethan for telling me about the open position in Chicago; Frank for coming to Platteville that weekend in December – I don’t know what your side of the story was from that weekend, but no matter how simple or complicated it was, I am happy you came; and finally Ian, a HUGE thank you for not giving up on me and for calling me out on my lame excuses, I didn’t have many people doing that in my life and I am happy you did – and I’ll say it again, you were right (at least for this one…). 

Thank you.